The Gonzalez Family Herald

Headlines and commentary from a Northern California family of seven.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Ooooh... Breakfast.

In all thirty some years of my existence I have come to realize a few things that have rewritten the course for my family life. One of these revelations has been...

Not much can make a Saturday better than pancakes and sausage, coffee and football with all five kids.

What an excellent idea. I think I'll do that.

Friday, October 28, 2005

What an insane week

Man, this week has been crazy. It seemed to be the usual business... PE for the kids on Monday, other studies throughout the week. Mom has a meeting that she attends on Tuesdays. I was pitching web development proposal on Tuesday. Other than that though I couldn't tell where the rest of the week went.

It seems that in the midst of being busy that I somehow misplaced my stability. I did however find a suitable substitute in disorganization, lack of leadership and complete overwheliming tiredness. Whew, glad that was all there for me. Not quite sure what I would have done otherwise.

Now it is time for the weekend. And I am really glad that I have the next couple of days off. I miss my family. I want to spend time with them. Granted I will probably be painting or cleaning this weekend. But at least it will be at home with the wife and kids instead of away from. I hope I get to soak them up because I really do miss them.

OK, now I am getting teary eyed. I should stop. Plus, I don't want you to start feeling sorry me or something. But you can if you want to. Maybe then you might buy the stuff I listed on eBay. And if not, then I will still be enjoying my family. Maybe you could do the same. I bet they miss you.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

eBaying my way to millions

So I just finished listing the first 12 of about fifty things that I plan on selling on eBay. I believe that I am a full fledged eBay junkie. Or maybe I am just a guy trying to take care of my family while at the same time avoiding the trauma of having a garage sale. Anyway, take a look at my auctions and tell me what you think. Or better yet, why not buy something? That way I can get lots of money and you can have the satisfaction of knowing that you helped me do it?

Yeah, I agree that was probably not the best marketing a guy could offer. But hey, at least it is truth in advertising. Have a good one and I will post later. My son is screaming his head off right now. I think he needs some dad time. I know I can use some son time. See you later.

Friday, October 21, 2005

Career Planning

I ran across this little snippet of humor the other day and thought I'd share it. I especially like the second one...
  • If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.
  • The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.
  • Sure, you may not like working here, but we pay your rent.
  • Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings -- they did it by killing all those who opposed them.
  • A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.
  • If at first you don't succeed--try management.
  • Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.
  • Never quit until you have another job.
  • Hang in there: Retirement is only 30 years away!
  • Go the extra mile--It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker.
  • Pride, commitment, teamwork--words we use to get you to work for free.
  • Work: It isn't just for sleeping anymore.
  • There are two kinds of people in life: people who like their jobs, and people who don't work here anymore.
Well there you have it, a little bit of funny to start your day.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Hibicus Flobicus, a Porcufunny and a Carrot


Simmuh' dawn nah. A couple of weeks ago my kids were given an assignment by the best teacher in the world (their mom) that involved creating something out of clay and giving it a name. This exercised the same instructions God gave to Adam when animals were created and "Adam named the animals".

I am certain Adam was of superior intelligence seeing as I have had a tough time naming five children, let alone hundreds of thousands of animals. However, when a 9 year old, 8 year old and 5 year old are tasked with this challenge, this is what we get...

Welcome to the world Hibicus Flobicus, hope you like your new digs. Creativity in a child is so cool. 9 years old and already creating postmodern, Andy Warhol looking clay creations. Oh the joy... Salvador Dali would be so proud. I know dad is.

Not to be outdone, we also have a Porcufunny, created and named by our ever-creative 5 year old...

This one is cute. I know the clarity in the pictures is a bit shaky (which is why I am posting only two of the creation exercise photos - the other photos of this exercise are a little blurry) but I think you can see the wonderful symmetry shown in this creation - not unlike the symmetry shown by our Creator every time we look in the mirror.

Since I couldn't get the other pictures up here, I thought I would show off still more creativity demonstrated by our 8 year old. Take a look at this little wonder...

I know it is clay, but the details that my daughter thought to include in this was amazing. The leaves have their veins, the carrot has its grooves. The symmetry is nice (there's that word again) and even the colors are right on. Does mom know how to teach some kid folk or what? Whoooo daddy, da' woman good at what she do.

Anyhow, enough for now. I will share more later. I was thinking about sharing some of the root word studies we are doing in school right now. Or some of the math technique we are learning in case you want some cool technique that is not taught in public schools. We'll see, I am not sure that I am going to do with any of that yet.

Until next time, challenge your kids to think and be creative and encourage their learning. Most kids can learn just about anything they are taught when they a) trust the teacher, b) trust the material and c) find the fun in learning the material.

Friday, October 14, 2005

What would you do?

I went through the pictures last night, and after a brief discussion with Mom about why our 9, 8, 5 and 2 year olds should or should not be allowed to watch CSI (not Miami or New York, but the original) I decided to retire the TV shows in favor of a family activity that involved the TV. Well, what would you do? So I pulled out the camera, hooked it up to the TV and we had a "stereophonic, multimedia" event in our living room.

Quick question. What does a two year old do when presented with a camera pointed at her that is just about on her level? Well, what would you do...

Yeah, me too. Although I would probably smile for the camera or something. Oh wait, she did...

That's better. And her nose is clear too. Who could ask for anything more?

Another question. What if you just turned five and mom and dad gave you a chocolate cupcake for your birthday? What about chocolate pudding. Well, what would you do...

Now suppose you were about three months old. And let's say that it was a little chilly outside. And let's say that your Mom just wrapped you up in some warm clothes and held you closely to her ever-loving, food-bearing breasts. Wouldn't you be happy? Well, what would you do...

Of course, if you were three months old, and your diaper was not dirty and your belly was full and you were a boy and you had four loving sisters that wanted you as their number one dolly and you had a Dad with an overactive photographic trigger finger, you might be in a good mood. You might even smile. If not, what would you do...

And lastly, if you were a great big enormous ghastly looking spider, and you had two huge nasty funky humps on your back and you had these like funky white and red legs and nasty hairy knuckles and you wanted to make a web, wouldn't you make it in my back yard where four of my five kids could easily walk into your web and cause you to go straight Oscar De La Hoya on them with those funky mean looking fangs? And if you were a dad, with a camera and some pretty excited kids, wouldn't you want to cherish the moment your kids called you over to see this behemoth freak of nature hanging in the middle of the air from your crepe myrtle tree? Well, what would you do...

Yeah, yeah, normally I would kill it too. But this thing was so gnarly looking I had to marvel at it's sheer nastiness and permanently record it's wicked existence. Here's another...

And that's all for now. I have a few cool ones for a later post. If I forget, ask me for pictures of the Hibicus Flobbicus and the Porcufunny.

Or you can just keep staring at that spider. Man that dude is amazing...

Thursday, October 13, 2005

I know I am bragging, but ...

I know I talk a lot about my kids and how amazed I am at their levels of intelligence. The other day I was awestruck at a conversation my two year old and I had. Yes, you read that right, my two year old and I actually had a conversation.

After an evening spent on a quest for all available Costco samples the girls and I left the store. My older three walking beside me and my two year old in the cart. She likes to ride in the back of the cart so she can walk around while we are moving (please do not send me your child endangerment comments as I will use them to line the bird cage or something). As we left Costco we ran the cart over the little pimply strip of beads just outside the loading area. We usually stay on them for a while so the kids can all get on the cart and feel the "bumpilies".

That night, during bed time, my two-year old asked me to lay with her and read her a book. OK, this may sound strange enough as it is, a two year old actually asking for this, but she did. She does everynight... "Dad, can you lay with me? Can you read a book for me?" No googoo gaga, no partial words, no implied meaning using grunts or finger pointing. Actual human intelligible words correctly connected using proper grammar and sentence structure. WOW.

Anyway, as I was laying with her after finishing out book, I asked her was she had done that day. She told me she "rode in the cart". I asked her if it was fun and she said "yes, we were on the bumpilies". I then asked her what the bumpilies felt like. She turned her head to the side as though she was thinking, paused for a moment and then said, "they feel like Veggie Tales." Stunned and confused, I asked her "Veggie Tales?" She said "Yeah, combination Veggie Tales." OK then, maybe she is two.

I have another funny about my older kids that I will save for another time. But I can say this, the hits just keep coming. Something new everyday for this blog. The kids love it. And so do mom and I.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Google AdSense blows

I am a big fan of Google and their technologies, but there is one thing about them that I think it really rank. There AdSense program does not deliver as they say it does. The following comes from Google's description of their AdSense program...

When your content changes, so do your ads.

Google AdSense technology goes beyond simple keyword or category matching. We work hard to understand your content and deliver ads that are relevant to specific pages, automatically, no matter how many thousands of pages your site may have, or how specialized or broad your content. As your content changes, Google's ads change to match. And since our ads are also targeted by country, global businesses can display local advertising with no additional effort.

OK, the way I read this makes me believe that as different things appear in my blog different ads appear in my AdSense output. But all that I am getting are public service announements. This is very frustrating. Given all the kid references, homeschooling references and other references to all the other stuff we post about in this blog, you would think that AdSense would be able to find something to throw ads about. Oh well, maybe I am asking Google for too much.

There has been quite a bit to write about lately. I will be putting together a nice little post about the happenings of late within the next few days. Until then, Hasta La Vista baby.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Quick notes before bedtime

As you can judge by the time this is being written I am about to go to bed. I just thought I'd throw out the fact that I am placing Google AdWords across the top of the blog to see if it will generate any revenue for my large family (did I mention that I am a father of five?). I will be testing this for a little bit and if it proves to be totally useless then I will stop.

Good night all. I will post more soon, I promise.

Monday, October 03, 2005

News from the cute

So it has been a while since something tickled me. But today there were a couple of things.

My two year old daughter was sitting with me on the couch when she looks down the hallway, points at the bathroom and says "My bath is coming." That was so cute to me. Then she says "It's my bath time and it's {NAME_REMOVED} bath time. Can I go?" So naturally I told her "You are too cute." to which she replied "No I'm not". So I said again "You are too cute" and she again replied "No I'm not". After a bit of volleying over this matter, she finally appended her response with "No I'm not, I'm {NAME_REMOVED}."

Taken back by this cuteness I called me wife over and had her listen to another exchange of this father-daughter conversation. After it ended the way it had the first time, my wife told my daughter, "You are so cute" to which my daughter replied "No I'm not". Can you see where that one went?

In other astonishing news
At the dinner table my wife was having the kids go over how a person can be respectful in various situations (at the store, at someone's home, when others are at our home, etc). After a lot of very good answers from my five year old, eight year and nine year old, my oldest, the nine year old, said "We should not take advantage of other people's hospitality". Huh? Where the heck does a nine year old learn to talk like that?

Oh wait, that's right. Mom and dad teach the kids in our house. Hey, this stuff really works!

And if you think it doesn't, the other night a friend of ours gave us some old curriculum of theirs that they used for homeschooling. Some of the tools were little question and answer cards that had "Ages 7 to 9" enscribed on them. As I was reading the questions I was awestruck to find that many of the questions were of a caliber that my five year old could answer. In fact, my eight and nine year old's asked me to give them harder questions because the ones I had given them "were too easy". Again, this stuff really works!

Any how, enough of this "My kids are so freakin' smart" stuff. It's not that I don't like bragging about them and how well their mother has taught them. It's just that it is getting late and I would like to get some rest. You should, too. Tomorrow is a big day.

Keep praying for the victims of Katrina and Rita. With enough prayer and support we can all help restore their land and bring restoration to their communities.